Crisp Criticism: "Hitman: Agent 47", "Irrational Man", "Dope", "Results"

by

Julien Faddoul

Hitman: Agent 47

An assassin teams up with a woman to help her find her father and uncover the mysteries of her ancestry.

Idiotically implausible thriller based on a video game with dialogue so crass it feels as if it were mistranslated from a foreign language.

d – Aleksander Bach

w – Skip Woods, Michael Finch

ph – Ottar Guonason

pd – Sebastian T. Krawinkel

m – Marco Beltrami

ed – Nicolas De Toth

cos – Bina Daigeler

p – Adrian Askarieh, Charles Gordon, Alex Young

Cast: Rupert Friend, Zachary Quinto, Hannah Ware, Emilio Rivera, Rolf Kanies, Thomas Kretschmann, Dan Bakkedahl, Ciarán Hinds, Mona Pirzad, Prince William E. Morris, Michaela Caspar, Jerry Hoffmann

Southpaw (2015/US)

by

Julien Faddoul

(0 stars)

d – Antoine Fuqua

w – Kurt Sutter

ph – Mauro Fiore

pd – Derek R. Hill

m – James Horner

ed – John Refoua

cos – David C. Robinson

p – Todd Black, Jason Blumenthal, Antoine Fuqua, Alan Riche, Peter Riche, Steve Tisch, Jerry Ye

Cast: Jake Gyllenhaal, Rachel McAdams, Forest Whitaker, Oona Laurence, Naomie Harris, Rita Ora, 50 Cent, Clare Foley, Beau Knapp

Southpaw makes one feel as if they are in a shopping mall watching some guy shout at his kids. You examine the situation: Here's a man with difficulties of his own, who is projecting his problems onto his loved ones – because he is sure he can regulate them and is sure he can't regulate himself. The world has him conquered. The situation makes you feel dejected and uncomfortable because a) it’s none of your business and b) you’ve seen it countless times already.

Crisp Criticism - "The Man from U.N.C.L.E.", "Fantastic 4", "Vacation"

by

Julien Faddoul

The Man from U.N.C.L.E. *

In the early 1960s, a CIA agent and a KGB operative participate in a joint mission against a mysterious criminal organization, which is working to proliferate nuclear weapons.

Perfectly charming for half of its runtime, this light, altogether inconsequential spy thriller, based on the 60’s TV series, then turns into the monotonous jangle of action that its director is addicted to.

d – Guy Ritchie

w – Jeff Kleeman, David Campbell Wilson, Guy Ritchie, Lionel Wigram   (Based on the TV Series by Sam Rolfe)

ph – John Mathieson

pd – Olover Scholl

m – Daniel Pemberton

ed – James Herbert

cos – Joanna Johnston

p – Steve Clark-Hall, John Davis, Jeff Kleeman, Lionel Wigram

Cast: Henry Cavill, Armie Hammer, Alicia Vikander, Elizabeth Debicki, Luca Calvani, Sylvester Groth, Hugh Grant, Jared Harris, Christian Berkel

Crisp Criticism - "Trainwreck", "Mission: Impossible – Rogue Nation", "A Pigeon Sat on a Branch Reflecting on Existence", "Da Sweet Blood of Jesus"

by

Julien Faddoul

Trainwreck

Having thought that monogamy was never possible, a commitment-phobic career woman may have to face her fears when she meets a good guy.

An overrated and judgmental film: It presumes a kind of conceited approach to its main character’s arc and its supporting characters’ view of her, relaying it as some kind of feminism despite none of it fitting any textbook example of the term. It expects its audience to follow its viewpoint around like dogs for fear of feeling stupid, all the while forgetting that in the cinema everything is about context. All this along with the gross over-length, flat humor and superfluous celebrity cameos typical of its director.

d – Judd Apatow

w – Amy Schumer

ph – Jody Lee Lipes

pd – Kevin Thompson

m – Jon Brion

ed – William Kerr, Peck Prior, Paul Zucker

cos – Leesa Evans

p – Judd Apatow, Barry Mandel

Cast: Amy Schumer, Bill Hader, Brie Larson, Colin Quinn, Vanessa Bayer, Tilda Swinton, LeBron James, Mike Birbiglia, John Cena, Dave Attell, Norman Lloyd, Ezra Miller, Daniel Radcliffe, Marisa Tomei, Jon Glaser, Randall Park, Evan Brinkman, Pete Davidson, Tim Meadows, Kyle Dunnigan, Amar'e Stoudemire, Matthew Broderick, Marv Albert, Leslie Jones